Ego

This last July 4th, I hung out with a good friend of mine, one I'd known since fall of 2005. She and I were talking about life back then and particularly about how incredibly arrogant and prideful I was. I've thought often on her observation. I really was conceited. Now that I've recognized that, I realized that I was the kind of person that I've always found annoying.

That being said, I was also happy then. Maybe this is just the 'rose colored glasses' thing, but I really think I was happy then. I was also more decisive, bolder, and decidedly less tasteful. I wore garish outfits and told stories about myself with gusto. I was my own hero and I was so sure that everyone would love me if only they knew enough about me. I bet girls just laughed at me.

I am different now. I am more composed, more reserved, and a much more effective student. However, I've lost a lot of the capacity I had to be likeable. There wasn't much mystery with the old me. I was just me. Now, I've got layers and protection. I've become a shelled person. My date plans used to always be centered on breaking shells, but I've actually immunized myself against shell breaking. I don't take chances; I protect myself by knowing exactly how to avoid breaking my own shell.

I think I'm missing out on something sweet. I think I'm missing out on the chance to benefit from growing outside my comfort zone. Yep, I'm a bum. Crap.

Provo

Well; I've finally been able to admit it to myself. I've had a bad attitude. I've been blaming Provo for being 'less than Rexburg' which is probably a very true statement... (I'm biased, I love Rexburg.) That being said, it still is no excuse for not throwing myself into the Provo chapter of my life with more enthusiasm and cheer.

Unfortunately, this realization comes to me after I think I've already established more friends here than I really deserve, considering my poor attitude. I'm happy to be here for the opportunity it really is for me; both academically and socially. Where could I have gone from Rexburg that would have afforded me both aspects? I'm pretty blessed. Who cares that I never thought I'd be here... Surprise Ryan!! I'll just move on, enjoy what this has to offer me, and stop complaining.

So, here is my game plan: don't talk about how much better Rexburg is anymore (at least in Provo), leave my apartment to visit someone every night, and plan an activity once a week to invite people to participate in. Additionally, I should probably set some goals regarding dating.... but I think I'll leave those off the internet... wouldn't want anyone to be able to hold me to them... haha!

Someone's got to be ready to break the curse in 8 months...

(Chris to Jon: 6 months?
Jon to Bryce: 7 months?
Bryce to ________: 8 months... Right?)

No witness till after...

It has been a long school year for me. Last September, I was anticipating the interview offers from medical schools to come pouring in. I received a total of 3. Now, I'm not complaining, as 3 is certainly enough if one lets you in. I interviewed with my top two schools and then received rejection letters in January. Thankfully, I am blessed, and I was inspired to apply to graduate programs before their deadlines at the end of that same month. I applied, and today I was accepted to the place I was inspired to apply to.

I have been accepted into the doctorate program of biochemistry at BYU. I never, ever, ever wanted to go to grad school, nor to BYU. That being said, I guess I am going to do both. The President of BYU-Idaho, Pres. Kim B. Clark, teaches a principle of how the Lord "educates your desires" till you, in fact, desire what He knows is best for you. I think I've experienced it. I'm super excited. This is gonna be fun!! So, for the family that might read this... I'm gonna go to BYU and get a PhD in Biochemistry. Wow... crazy!

Hmm... ice....

Shoot, I should have added this to my bucket list so I could have marked it off. I totally went Ice climbing. It was fantastic!! It was a super brisk morning but the ice was good. It's a surreal experience, the other falls I climbed more especially. As I would swing an ice axe above my head into a chunk of ice and have pieces fly off into the air, I pondered how cool it is to stand on a pillar of ice. Chunks of ice would fracture off to fall as I would use the axe, making it all the cooler... I loved it. I totally want to do it again, I'll add more pictures as they are emailed to me.

Oh, and FYI, it was Hyalite Canyon, just south of Bozeman, MT.